How to Deal with Sleep Deprivation as a Working Mom
Table of Contents
The Exhaustion No One Warned You About
Let’s be real—being a working mom is not a joke. Between school drop-offs, early meetings, late-night feedings, and never-ending to-do lists, sleep often feels like a luxury you just can’t afford. If you’re running on fumes and wondering how long you can keep going like this, you’re not alone. Sleep deprivation is one of the hardest parts of motherhood, especially when you’re also managing a career. But don’t worry, mama. You’re not failing—you’re just tired. And there are ways to make it easier.
Let’s talk about simple, doable strategies to help you survive and even thrive during this exhausting phase of life.
1. Why Sleep Deprivation Hits Working Moms So Hard
“It’s not just about feeling tired—it’s emotional, mental, and physical fatigue all rolled into one.”
Sleep deprivation is more than just a lack of rest. It sneaks into every part of your life. It affects your mood—you might find yourself getting frustrated more quickly or feeling on edge over the smallest things. It clouds your memory, making it harder to remember simple tasks like where you put your keys or what you needed from the store. It slows your reaction time, dulls your decision-making, and makes it feel like your brain is wading through fog.
Your immune system takes a hit too. That’s why you might find yourself catching every cold that goes around your child’s daycare. When your body is sleep-deprived, it can’t recover or fight off illness as well as it should. Even your heart health, metabolism, and hormones are impacted—so it’s no surprise you’re running on empty.
And here’s the thing: unlike some people who can crash on the couch after work, working moms often head into their “second shift” when they get home. There are snacks to prepare, homework to help with, laundry to fold, and bedtime routines to manage. It’s a constant go-go-go, even when your body is screaming for rest.
Let’s not forget the mental load either—that invisible to-do list running in your head all day: Did I sign the field trip form? What time is the pediatrician appointment? Did I reply to that email from my boss? Sleep deprivation makes carrying this mental weight feel so much heavier.
Then there’s the emotional pressure. At work, you want to be seen as competent, focused, and productive. At home, you want to be nurturing, present, and patient. But when you’re barely sleeping, those expectations—especially the ones we put on ourselves—can feel impossible to meet.
This is why so many working moms describe themselves as barely staying afloat. Not because they aren’t capable, but because they’re doing so much on so little rest. Understanding this is the first step toward giving yourself the compassion you deserve—and creating space to take care of your own well-being.
2. Give Yourself Grace: Adjust Expectations and Ask for Help
Let Go of Perfection
We’ve all seen those Instagram-perfect moms with spotless homes, matching outfits, healthy homemade meals, and smiling kids. And while that might look great in a photo, real life doesn’t work like that—especially when you’re running on little to no sleep.
Let’s be honest: trying to do everything “perfectly” when you’re exhausted is a recipe for burnout. You’re already giving so much of yourself—to your family, your job, your kids—and holding yourself to impossible standards just adds pressure where there should be compassion.
Here’s a gentle truth: you don’t have to do it all. The dishes can wait. The toys on the floor don’t define you. And if your child’s lunch isn’t shaped like a dinosaur today, they’ll still feel loved and full. Instead of chasing perfection, try chasing peace.
Sometimes, “good enough” is perfect for right now. Didn’t fold the laundry? It’s still clean. Forgot to pack your kid’s water bottle? They’ll be okay. You are showing up in the best way you can—and that is enough. The people who matter most (your kids) don’t need a perfect mom. They need you. Present. Loving. Human.
Start giving yourself the same grace you give your children when they’re learning, stumbling, or growing. Motherhood doesn’t come with a trophy for doing it all—but peace of mind is worth so much more.
Ask for Support (and Accept It)
Now, this is where it gets a bit tricky for many moms. If you’re the one who usually “takes care of everything,” asking for help might feel foreign—or even uncomfortable. But here’s the thing: asking for help isn’t a weakness. It’s a strength. It shows that you know your limits, and you’re brave enough to say, “I can’t do this alone today.”
Support can come in many forms. Maybe your partner can take over baby’s night feedings a few times a week. Or maybe a family member can come over to hold the baby so you can take a nap or a long shower. Maybe a friend offers to pick up your groceries or bring dinner—say yes.
Sometimes it’s not even about what people do, but simply being seen and heard. Telling a friend, “Hey, I’m really tired today,” can open the door to empathy, reassurance, or even just a shared laugh that makes things feel lighter.
And remember: you don’t have to wait until you’re completely burnt out to ask for support. Think of it like parenting reserves—you need fuel in your tank to care for others. Leaning on your village isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity.
If someone offers help, don’t shrug it off with, “I’m fine.” Instead, try something like, “Actually, that would be amazing—thank you.” You’d be surprised how willing people are to support you when they know what you need.
3. Steal Sleep Whenever You Can: Optimize Every Minute
When you’re a working mom, uninterrupted sleep often feels like a distant dream. You may not get a full 8 hours—and that’s okay. But instead of waiting for the perfect night of sleep (which might not come anytime soon), it’s better to grab little moments of rest wherever and whenever you can.
This section is all about helping you maximize the sleep opportunities you do have—even if they’re short, broken, or squeezed into your chaotic schedule.
Go to Bed a Little Earlier
We get it. After the kids are finally asleep, the house is quiet, and you finally have a moment to yourself… it’s so tempting to stay up late. That quiet time might feel sacred—your only chance to scroll, binge-watch, or just be alone.
But here’s the catch: those late-night hours often steal your chance to truly recharge. Even an extra 20 or 30 minutes of sleep can make a surprising difference in how you feel the next day. It might not sound like much, but for a tired mom, it’s golden.
If going to bed earlier feels like a huge shift, try doing it in small steps. Move your bedtime up by 10 minutes tonight. Then 10 more the next night. Over time, it adds up.
Also, consider this: that “me time” doesn’t have to be late at night. Can you carve out a few quiet minutes earlier in the evening? Or maybe in the morning before the house wakes up? Reframing when you get personal time might help you feel less deprived—and more rested.
Nap Smart During the Day
Let’s be real—most working moms can’t take long afternoon naps. But that doesn’t mean naps are off the table. Micro-naps—even just 10 to 20 minutes—can refresh your brain, boost your mood, and help you feel more human again.
If you work from home or have a flexible job, use your lunch break or a short window of downtime to close your eyes. Even if you don’t fall fully asleep, just resting your body and shutting out the world for a few minutes can help.
For office moms, consider taking a few minutes in your car or in a quiet space (if available) to decompress. Rest isn’t just about sleep—it’s also about giving your brain a break from constant stimulation.
Also, don’t overlook weekend naps. If your child still naps, lie down when they do, even if just for 15 minutes. The laundry can wait. Your energy is more important.
Pro tip: Set an alarm so your nap doesn’t run too long—10–20 minutes is ideal to avoid waking up groggy.
Avoid Screens Before Bed
It’s 10 p.m. and you’re lying in bed, phone in hand, scrolling through Instagram, answering emails, or watching YouTube. Sound familiar?
We’ve all done it—but screens before bedtime are sneaky sleep stealers. The blue light from phones, tablets, and TVs interferes with your body’s production of melatonin—the hormone that helps you feel sleepy. Your brain starts thinking it’s still daytime, making it harder to wind down.
What can you do instead?
- Set a “screen curfew” about 30–60 minutes before bed. Put your phone on airplane mode or leave it in another room.
- Swap screen time for soothing habits: a warm shower, a few pages of a book, journaling your thoughts, or gentle stretches.
- Try dim lighting, soft music, or even guided meditations to help your body and brain relax.
If you absolutely must use your phone, turn on Night Shift mode or install a blue light filter app to reduce the harsh lighting. But ideally, your bed should be a screen-free zone—your mind will thank you in the morning.
4. Rethink Nighttime Parenting Without the Guilt
Nighttime parenting can be one of the most exhausting parts of motherhood—especially when you’re trying to function at work the next day. But here’s something important to remember: you don’t have to be the only one carrying that load. And how you respond to those middle-of-the-night moments can make a big difference in how well (or poorly) you rest.
Share the Nighttime Duties
If you have a partner, one of the most loving and practical things you can do for each other is take turns at night. It doesn’t have to be perfectly split, but having a plan in place—where each of you gets a stretch of uninterrupted sleep—can be a total game-changer.
Here are a few ideas that many couples find helpful:
- Alternate nights: One parent takes full responsibility for wake-ups one night, the other parent handles the next.
- Split the night: One person covers from bedtime to 2 a.m., the other takes over from 2 a.m. to morning.
- Divide the tasks: Maybe one of you handles feeding, and the other handles diaper changes or rocking back to sleep.
Even if your partner works different hours or isn’t always available at night, talk honestly about what’s doable. Could they take the early morning shift on weekends? Or handle naps during the day so you can rest?
And if you’re parenting solo? First of all—you’re amazing. It’s a heavy lift, and it’s okay to acknowledge that it’s hard. But that doesn’t mean you’re without options:
- Consider asking a trusted family member or friend to help out once or twice a week so you can get one good stretch of sleep.
- Explore gentle sleep training methods if your child is old enough. There’s no shame in teaching your little one how to self-soothe—especially if it means you both get more rest in the long run.
- If possible, hire a babysitter or sleep doula once in a while—even a few hours of rest can make a big impact.
Sharing nighttime duties, however you do it, isn’t about being lazy or selfish—it’s about surviving and staying healthy during a very demanding season of life.
Keep Wake-Ups Low-Stimulation
Middle-of-the-night wake-ups are almost inevitable in the early parenting years. But how you handle those wake-ups can make the difference between getting back to sleep quickly—or staying wide awake for hours afterward.
Here’s what helps:
- Use soft lighting: Bright overhead lights signal to your brain that it’s morning. Instead, keep a dim nightlight or a soft bedside lamp nearby. Look for lights with a warm, amber glow—they’re less disruptive to melatonin production.
- Minimize noise and talking: Avoid chatting, even if your baby or toddler seems alert. Keep your voice low and soothing. The goal is to communicate, “This is still sleepy time, not playtime.”
- Keep movements slow and gentle: Whether you’re feeding, changing a diaper, or comforting a fussy baby, try to keep everything as calm and quiet as possible. The less stimulation, the quicker both of you can drift back to sleep.
- Skip screen time: Resist the urge to scroll your phone while you’re rocking your baby—it will wake up your brain and make it harder to fall asleep after. Instead, use this time for mindful breathing, gentle affirmations, or just resting your eyes.
- Be efficient, not rushed: Prepare a “nighttime basket” next to your bed with everything you need: diapers, wipes, burp cloths, water bottle, etc. This helps reduce the amount of time you’re fully awake and avoids the frustration of rummaging around in the dark.
The key here is creating a nighttime rhythm that says: “We’re still in sleep mode.” The more you keep those wake-ups low-stimulation, the easier it’ll be to fall back asleep quickly—and that adds up over time.
5. Fuel Your Body, Not Just Your Coffee Cup
Let’s be honest: when you’re running on two hours of sleep and still have a full workday and parenting duties ahead, it’s so easy to reach for a strong cup of coffee or that tempting chocolate bar. And while they do give you a quick jolt, the crash afterward? Brutal. That sugar high or caffeine buzz can leave you feeling even more drained an hour later.
The good news? There are simple ways to nourish your body so it actually helps you stay energized—not just wired and jittery. Let’s talk about two of the easiest and most effective: choosing energy-boosting foods and getting gentle movement into your day.
Choose Energy-Boosting Foods
You don’t need fancy green smoothies or expensive supplements—just a few smarter snack swaps can make a big difference.
When your body is sleep-deprived, it needs steady fuel to function—not quick spikes. Think foods that are high in fiber, protein, and healthy fats, which release energy slowly and help you avoid that afternoon crash.
Here are some easy, mom-friendly ideas:
- Bananas: Packed with natural sugars, potassium, and vitamin B6, bananas are the perfect grab-and-go snack that gives your brain a boost without the crash.
- Almonds or mixed nuts: A small handful gives you protein, healthy fat, and magnesium (which supports better sleep later).
- Oatmeal: It’s not just for breakfast! It keeps blood sugar stable and pairs well with fruit or a scoop of nut butter for extra protein.
- Greek yogurt with berries or honey: High in protein and probiotics (great for digestion and mood).
- Boiled eggs or hummus with veggie sticks: Protein-packed and easy to prep ahead.
- Dark chocolate (in moderation!): A little goes a long way. It satisfies the sweet craving and contains antioxidants and a small caffeine boost without going overboard.
Oh—and don’t forget your water. We often confuse dehydration with fatigue. Keep a bottle nearby all day. Add a slice of lemon, cucumber, or mint if plain water feels boring. Hydration is a secret energy trick many of us overlook.
Remember, feeding yourself well isn’t a luxury—it’s basic self-care. You’re not being “extra” by putting your health first. You’re simply giving your body the tools it needs to keep going.
Move Your Body—Even Just a Little
I know—when you’re exhausted, exercise is the last thing you want to think about. But here’s a secret: it doesn’t have to be intense or time-consuming to make a difference.
Movement gets your blood flowing, wakes up your brain, and releases feel-good chemicals (like dopamine and endorphins) that actually make you feel more awake and less irritable.
You don’t have to “work out.” Just move more during your regular routine. For example:
- Do 10 minutes of stretching in the morning before the kids wake up.
- Take the stairs at work or do a few squats while brushing your teeth.
- Dance around the living room with your little one—it’s fun, silly, and counts as cardio!
- Walk outside during your lunch break or even just stand up and stretch between Zoom meetings.
Even five minutes of movement can shift your energy and mindset. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s progress. Some movement is always better than none, especially on days when sleep is scarce.
So the next time you feel like crashing mid-day, try this combo: a glass of water, a banana, and a quick walk around the block. It might not replace a full night of sleep—but it’ll help you push through with a little more strength and a lot more grace.
6. Don’t Let Work Overwhelm You: Plan for Low-Energy Days
We all have days when even opening the laptop feels like climbing a mountain — and when you’re sleep-deprived, these days happen a lot. But here’s the thing: you don’t have to power through every single task at 100%. Some days, your best won’t look like your usual best — and that’s totally okay.
Instead of pushing yourself to do it all, try planning around your energy levels. Think of it like working smarter, not harder.
Build a “Low-Energy” Task List
Here’s a simple but powerful idea: make a list of tasks you can do even when you’re running on fumes. Things that are low-pressure, require less brainpower, and don’t drain your already-tired body or mind.
For example:
- Responding to non-urgent emails
- Updating spreadsheets or doing routine admin work
- Reading or reviewing documents
- Tidying your workspace
- Organizing digital files
- Setting up meetings or calendar invites
Save this list somewhere easy to find — maybe on a sticky note, your desktop, or a note app on your phone. That way, when a tired day hits (and it will), you already know where to start without thinking too hard.
Communicate with Your Team
One of the most empowering things you can do? Be honest — with yourself and others. You don’t have to share every detail about your rough night, but saying something like “I’m having a low-energy day, so I’m focusing on light tasks today” is totally fair.
More often than not, your coworkers or manager will understand — many of them are parents too, or at least human beings who’ve had rough days themselves. And if you’re working remotely or in a flexible environment, try shifting your schedule. Maybe do the harder stuff when your energy peaks (like mid-morning) and save lighter tasks for later.
Pre-Plan Your Week with Flexibility
When you’re mapping out your workweek, try to anticipate that not every day will be productive. Build a little breathing room into your schedule. That way, if you have a rough night and wake up groggy, you’re not staring down a wall of deadlines and stress.
Here’s a quick tip: don’t overload Mondays. Start the week gently. Space out big projects. Block off small windows of “quiet time” if possible. And if you’re managing others, remember to extend the same grace to your team too.
Redefine “Success” on Tired Days
You may not feel like your most productive, creative, or sharp self. That’s okay. Some days, success is simply showing up. Sending that one email. Crossing one small thing off your list. Being kind to yourself.
Let go of the pressure to “catch up” or “keep up” with unrealistic standards. Remember, you’re juggling a lot, and doing your best with the energy you’ve got is more than enough.
Gentle Reminder:
You are allowed to have slow days. They don’t make you lazy. They don’t make you less capable. They simply mean you’re human — and that you’re listening to your body. That’s something to be proud of.
7. Stop Chasing Perfect—Aim for Rest
Let’s be real—trying to do everything perfectly when you’re barely holding it together is a recipe for burnout. As working moms, we often carry this invisible pressure to have spotless homes, thriving careers, happy kids, and still look put-together ourselves. But here’s the truth: perfection is overrated. Rest is essential.
When you haven’t slept well, the last thing you need is to stress over unrealistic standards. It’s okay if the laundry waits one more day. It’s okay if dinner is frozen pizza. It’s okay if you skip that PTA meeting. Seriously — the world won’t fall apart.
Instead of pushing for “perfect,” give yourself permission to prioritize rest. That might mean:
- Letting go of non-urgent chores
- Taking a power nap during your break
- Saying no to one more commitment
- Letting your partner, kids, or support system take on more
The more you allow rest into your routine, the more energy you’ll have to show up where it matters most. You don’t need to be a supermom. You just need to be a mom who’s kind to herself.
8. Ask for Help Without Guilt
This one’s big — and hard for many of us. But hear this: asking for help does not make you weak. It makes you wise.
So many moms try to do it all alone because we’ve been taught that needing help is some sort of failure. But it’s not. In fact, the strongest moms are the ones who know when to raise their hand and say, “I need a little support right now.”
If you’re struggling to stay awake, get through the workday, or keep the house running — reach out:
- Ask your partner to handle bedtime or morning routines.
- See if a friend or family member can help with school pick-ups or errands.
- Consider hiring help (if you can) — even something small like grocery delivery can ease the load.
- Let your boss or coworkers know when you’re running low and need to shift deadlines.
Also, if your kids are old enough, let them pitch in! Assign small tasks — it teaches them responsibility and takes a little off your plate.
Remember: you don’t have to earn your rest or justify your fatigue. You’re allowed to need help simply because you’re human — not because you’re on the verge of collapsing.
9. Use Technology to Make Life Easier
If you’ve ever said, “I wish I had more hands,” — well, technology can be the next best thing! On those sleep-deprived days when even remembering what day it is feels hard, tech can help simplify your life in small but meaningful ways.
Here are a few mom-approved tech hacks:
- Set reminders on your phone for everything — from taking vitamins to school events to sending work reports.
- Use grocery delivery apps or meal prep services to save cooking time.
- Try meditation or sleep apps (like Calm or Insight Timer) for quick mental resets or 10-minute power naps.
- Use a family calendar app (like Cozi or Google Calendar) to keep everyone’s schedule in one place.
- Try smart speakers like Alexa or Google Home to set timers, play soothing music, or even tell your kids a story while you catch your breath.
Technology isn’t just for work — it can support your well-being. Lean into it. Automate where you can. The less you’re holding in your head, the more brain space you free up to rest and recharge.
10. Be Kind to Yourself (Especially on the Tough Days)
This might be the most important tip of all.
When you’re sleep-deprived, everything feels heavier — mistakes feel bigger, moods get shorter, and self-doubt creeps in fast. But please, don’t beat yourself up. You are doing something incredible: balancing motherhood and work on an empty tank. That takes courage.
So on the hard days, speak to yourself the way you’d speak to your best friend:
- “I’m doing the best I can right now.”
- “This is temporary — it will get easier.”
- “I’m allowed to rest.”
- “I’m still a good mom, even if today was messy.”
Practice self-compassion. It’s not selfish — it’s survival. Give yourself grace. Celebrate small wins. Laugh when things go sideways. And most importantly, remind yourself daily: you are enough. Just as you are.
Final Thoughts: You’re Tired, Not Failing
Being a working mom means doing two full-time jobs on limited sleep, and that’s no small feat. You’re not lazy. You’re not doing it wrong. You’re just running on low reserves—and that’s something you can work with, not against.
With small changes, a bit of support, and a lot of compassion for yourself, you can start to feel more like you again—even on the hard days. This phase won’t last forever. But until it passes, give yourself permission to rest, recover, and lean on others.
You’ve got this, mama.
FAQ Section
Q1: Is sleep deprivation dangerous for working moms?
Yes, it can impact your mental health, immune system, and job performance. That’s why even small changes—like going to bed earlier or eating better—can help.
Q2: How can I nap at work without feeling awkward?
Use your break to rest in your car, a wellness room, or even just close your eyes for 10 minutes at your desk (if it’s safe and appropriate). Some rest is better than none.
Q3: I feel guilty for being tired around my kids. What can I do?
Remind yourself that you’re still showing up for them—even if you’re exhausted. Kids need love, not perfection. Your presence matters more than anything.
Q4: What if my partner doesn’t help at night?
Have an honest talk about how the lack of sleep is affecting you. Try to create a shared plan that feels fair—and remember, asking for what you need is not selfish.
Q5: When should I talk to a doctor about my sleep deprivation?
If you’re feeling constantly drained, anxious, or hopeless, it’s time to get professional help. There’s no shame in needing support—it’s actually a strength.
